Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. ~Philippians 4:8~

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Wednesday, April 8, 2009

One of Those Days

Ever have one of those days when it's a struggle to feel joy about being alive? You know, you wake up and your back hurts, you know you didn't sleep well, and you teeter-totter through the morning routine. And then you start to have thoughts about death and mortality. You wonder if you feel this way because maybe you're dying and don't know it? For the sake of keeping a journal, I hereby share this day and the thoughts and feelings it brought to my mind.

So I wonder if it's about being 51 years old, and feeling the passage of time more keenly than before. Only, in truth, I've felt this way before in my youth as well. So obviously, it's not an age thing. Depression, you ask? No, I don't think it's that, but if it were, well, I say we're all entitled to a little bit from time to time. It does make you take stock of your life and think and meditate a bit on the deeper things. I wonder if this is a little bit of how King David felt when he was besieged by his enemies. The result of that---one of the most beautiful books in the Bible-- the Book of Psalms.

So, I have to think that in terms of what I don't know or see, I am being besieged by enemies. They're there all the time, waiting for an opportune moment to attack. It's also SO good to know that we have weapons with which to defeat this enemy. One of the most powerful weapons I have found to make him flee is Praise. I praise my Lord and Creator for all things, even for my weaknesses and my aches and pains. I praise him for my flaws, which are many, and my imperfections. I know he has a plan for me. That is all I need to know. And yes, I sometimes inwardly rebel, again another byproduct of that invisible enemy. I begin to question why God allows this or that to happen. I question and say "What the ? What is the purpose to this?" And I am reminded by the Spirit
"Nay but, O man, who art thou that repliest against God? Shall the thing formed say to him that formed it, Why hast thou made me thus?"
Romans 9:20

After reflecting on this and other Scriptures, I feel better. For I know I'm not alone in this journey. My Savior has traveled this road before me. And he intercedes for me before the Father. So I know I'll be ok. And as to sickness, disease, aches and pains? "But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him: and with his stripes we are healed."
Isaiah 53:5
Praise God! That whole Scripture speaks about Christ generations before he was born. Isaiah 53. The whole chapter from verse 1-12 is a portrait of Christ. Check out verse 2 ".....he hath no form nor comeliness; and when we shall see him, there is no beauty that we should desire him."
My Lord was not a handsome, goodlooking man. He was nothing like he is portrayed in artist's renditions! But if you don't read the Bible, you won't know that, will you?

In summary, I am saying, I am not perfect, I am full of flaws. And some days I wake up feeling terrible, thinking not so good thoughts. Yet, because of the grace of God, I am redeemed. And I hope if you are reading this, you will give some thought to your afterlife. And if you decide you want your life to change, to be full of the joy of the Lord, the answer is simple. Just go into prayer, and ask the Lord for forgiveness of your sins. Only he can give that. Confess before him that you believe he died for your sins. And then ask him into your heart, and tell him that you want him to rule over your life. Then read the Bible, to get to know him better. It's that simple. That is how your walk with God begins.
"Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me." Rev. 3: 20

10 comments:

Persuaded said...

oh hon... what a beautiful post...
it really says it all.

thanks so much for being so transparent,and letting *Him* shine through♥

Bob Mrotek said...

Very well said Yaya. I am 61 years old...ten years ahead of you. My parents have already gone before me and most of my older relatives. I look forward to the time when I will be reunited with them and "What a day of rejoicing that will be!". However, I don't want to leave this world until I can truly report to my Savior "Mission Accomplished" whatever that mission might be. You are a wonderful lady and you have miles to go before you sleep. Take heart young lady. You don't walk alone.

glorv1 said...

Yaya, you are a shining star and have many years to go. Ah, if I were your age again. Wow that would be nice. What is good about you if that no matter what mood you are in or what aches and pains you may have, the comfort of God is always at your side and I suppose all our sides. I find comfort in my prayers as well. I too wake with aches and pains and sometimes I turn to alieve.:) That helps me in pain. My inner being well that is different. You are fine yaya, be happy, well, and I am on my way to mail you a little goodie. Hope that makes you happy. Take care.

glorv1 said...

Hope you are feeling better yaya. Take care. Remember this, it could be worse.

YayaOrchid said...

Gloria, thank you so much! You are always so nice and encouraging with your comments. And I really appreciate it when you make me laugh! Laughter is good for the soul.

Now you have me intrigued about the mailing. :)

YayaOrchid said...

Diane and Bob: thank you for your comments as well! It is always good to hear from my blogging buddies. :)

glorv1 said...

Oh I am glad you are better yaya. I'm drinking a little glass of wine. It is actually starting to taste pretty good. Happy you are better. Take care of yourself, life is too short. You tell me all kinds of good things too.

Amy said...

Hang in there, Idalia. Maybe it's something in the air right now...I find myself struggling now and then. You are right to rely on Jesus, for all is good and right with Him. What are your plans for Easter?

Love,
Amy

Renee said...

Yaya you are a blessed woman. You help us all with your insight and prayers.

I hope that you and your family have a blessed Easter Day.

Will you get to see your grandson?

Love to you my dear friend.

Renee xoxoxo

YayaOrchid said...

Hi, Amy! Just going to be with my family. Younger Son came down to visit. And we're waiting for the call from Older Son when his Wife goes into labor for baby #2! Any day now.

Renee, you know ALL of us who have come to know you through your blog carry you in our thoughts and prayers for your healing. Happy Easter to you too!

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